Its been years that I've been having this kind of feeling. The feeling of when you know that people around you are so impractical, so intolerable, so annoying. Not being part of the typical people around me, at one point, makes me feel lonesome.
It may sound pathetic as it may be but the fact is that, it is. But reminiscing incidents that had occurred in my life, I think, all of these are worth it. Worth it? Cos it makes me strong, makes me different, makes me the minority, makes me not typical, makes me the person who 'campak la katne pon bleh hidup'.
'Campak katne pon bleh hidup'. I once argued with my friend on this statement that he actually made towards me in which he said that I'm lucky cos I'm the kind of person who can live whenever the world takes me. In which I don't agree with him. I may be a lucky girl, with a family background which money matters are usually not a big issue, but don't people know that money is not everything (well eventhough I agree with his statement that money can solve most things). That was the issue when I positively argued with him that we as Malays, should not feel comfortable of what we have (in which he don't agree with me, by raising the fact that I don't come from a family like him). For me, it is not the reason of where you come from in order for you not to participate in this 'competitive world'. Sejak zaman nabi lagi we compete. Why must now, we don't maintain of what our ancestors did? Being Malays in Malaysia, having the 'hak keistimewaan' etc, should not make you put yourself in the safe situation. I remembered when I told Najib what I argued with my friend, the news were aired on the television which I saw LOADS of CHINESE representing MALAYSIA for Olympics. No wonder they asked for 'hak kesamarataan' between us, cos they contribute A LOT to our country! I'm not saying that we did not contribute anything to our country, but please... STOP TALKING S*** AND START DOING IT! I don't wanna talk much since these may raise many sensitive issues. But, from this humble 21-years old girl, still studying, as what I OBSERVED, the Malays feel too secured (in which it is not the fact actually) and all I wanna say is that, EVERYBODY, WAKE UP AND WORK HARD! cos we are living in COMPETITIVE WORLD.
Ok, back to what the I actually wanna write here. Feeling lonesome. The fact that I can mingle around with ANY people that I want to, but knowing the fact that only few that I can regard as my friends and best friends, whenever they went back to their family over the weekend, this is when my heart felt empty. Loneliness will always be my friend and I'm quite sure then even when I get married, this might not fade away, knowing the nature of men with their mid-life crisis, provided that I STILL have my friends, I might not be alone going through the journey.
Life is KARMA...
Another disturbing piece of mind~
Monday, September 22, 2008Posted by NisYa at 7:29 PM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
RSS Feed (xml)
4 comments:
There is in certain living souls
A quality of loneliness unspeakable,
So great it must be shared
As company is shared by lesser beings.
Such a loneliness is mine; so know by this
That in immensity
There is one lonelier than you
"A Saucer of Loneliness" by Theodore Sturgeon
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone.
Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone. Orson Wells
When you close your doors, and make darkness within, remember never to say that you are alone, for you are not alone; nay, God is within, and your genius is within. And what need have they of light to see what you are doing? Epictetus
To Epictetus, all external events are determined by fate, and are thus beyond our control, but we can accept whatever happens calmly and dispassionately. Individuals, however, are responsible for their own actions which they can examine and control through rigorous self-discipline. As part of the universal city that is the universe, human beings have a duty of care to all fellow humans. The person who followed these precepts would achieve happiness.
What other people do matters not
What you do to other people matters less
What you do for other people matters most
hmmm... true...
"human beings have a duty of care to all fellow humans" - does this means that when you do good things to ppl, u will be happy? irregardless of wut other ppl do to u?
Post a Comment